Relationships

I have a question for everyone out there. What is the difference between a really close friend of the opposite sex and a significant other (girlfriend/boyfriend)? As of 9/9/2009 I think it is the commitment and sexual intimacy that separates the two relationships. If sexual intimacy is truly one of the main differences, then what happens when one engages in sexual activities with their close friend. What does their relationship become?

I feel as though when you have a girlfriend or declare an official relationship with another person, your mindset and attitude towards that person changes. The declaration comes with an obligation--to be loyal, true, kind, and loving--as well as promise of commitment.

Does it matter if two really close friends become sexually intimate? Given that the only difference between being close friends and officially "together" is sexual intimacy then there might not be a big difference. Although, it is true that engaging in such actions complicates the relationship and all the more reason why there exists two different labels. We come across another question, "Why does sex complicate?" The answer to that is mostly dependent on a case-by-case basis. Although, I think it is because sex is special and sacred and as a result come along with feelings.

Once two friends become sexually intimate what are they labeled as? The boundary between the two labels are blurred since we are no longer sure if they are together or just friends? Before attempting to answer the previous question one should ask, "Is a clear boundary important and necessary?" One example where a label would matter is when people outside of the couple are interested in someone within in the couple. This brings up the issue of exclusivity; the option of being exclusive or not it a decision that can be only settled within the couple. However if there is no issue, or in other words allowing one or both parties in the couple to be engage in specific activities with persons outside of the couple, then labeling their relationship should not be an issue.

Recall the situation of the two friends. At this point in their relationship, they have a choice of declaring and officially labeling their relationship whatever they please. That choice is rooted on which option is best (i.e. the option that allows function) for the couple.